Do you ever wonder whether, deep down, people genuinely think you’re likeable?  This can happen at times of doubt – say you’ve just suffered a setback or a snub.  Maybe the praise you’re receiving sounds a bit … contrived.  Or you could suspect someone’s motives for their interest in friendship.

Well, likeability is subjective, and not everyone will see you in the same way.  But in this article, we’ve put together 10 ways you can find out whether you’re likeable.  Some come from outside, but others require you to do some self analysis.

See what you think!

1. Get Feedback From Other People

Obviously, one of the most direct ways to assess your likaebility is by asking people for feedback. Use friends, family members, colleagues, or (if you can find them) mentors and ask for their honest opinions. If it’s constructive, this feedback will offer invaluable insights into how others perceive you.  It will highlight your strengths (which is always nice!) and areas where you need to improve. And remember not to be defensive or – worse – insulted.  Treat this as an opportunity to learn and grow.

2. Take a Likeability Test

Assessments and quizzes for likeability are designed to measure a number of aspects of likeability. They usually evaluate traits like how dependable, caring, capable, uplifting and amiable you are. And you can do it from home or in the office.  Taking an online likeability test will get objective scores and even advice on where you are strong, and areas where you may need more focus. But keep in mind that while these tests can be insightful, they aren’t definitive indicators of likeability.  So use them in conjunction with other sources of feedback.

3. Observe Social Cues

Looking at how people respond to you in social settings will provide some useful clues about your likeability. Good signs are when they engage in conversation with you, maintain eye contact, and use open body language.  This suggests that they enjoy your company … and like you. On the other hand, you can see bad signs when people avoid interaction, or they use closed-off body language.  These suggest that something could be wrong, and adjustments may be needed to improve your likeability.

4. Assess Your Levels of Empathy

You’ll need to show empathy if you want to build, and maintain, long term connections with other people.  So ask yourself: do you have a good understanding of others people’s perspectives, emotions, and experiences?  These all help to build trust and rapport. So show a genuine interest in others’ lives, and offer support and encouragement when needed. If you do this, you’ll create a positive impression and increase your likeability.

5. Gauge Your Positivity

Maintaining a positive attitude will have a prositive effect on your likeability. Positivity is contagious, too, so people will naturally be drawn to you.  If you want to do well here, show gratitude, focus on the bright side of life, and genuinely aim to see the best in others. You’ll create a positive mindset, and a welcoming and uplifting aura around you.  So smile often, offer encouragement, and look forward to challenges with a can-do attitude.  Your positivity will shine through!

6. Listen Actively

Being a good listener is a key part of likeable behavior. So when you’re communicating, make a genuine effort to pay attention to what others are saying . Ask thoughtful questions to show your interest and understanding, and give supportive feedback to show how much you value their input. Active listening doesn’t just strengthen your relationships, it also makes you more likeable by showing how you care about others people.

7. Be Authentic

Authenticity is a hallmark of likeable individuals. People are drawn to those who are genuine, sincere, and true to themselves. So don’t deny or fight your unique qualities and quirks, and avoid trying to work to other people’s expectations. When you’re authentic, other people are more likely to trust and relate to you. Remember that it’s okay to be imperfect and vulnerable, so be proud of your authenticity: it will encourage people to appreciate you for the person you truly are.

8. Use Humor (if you can…)

A good sense of humor is a powerful tool, and laughter has a universal appeal.  We can use it to break the ice, lighten the mood, and connect with other people. But always make sure you avoid offensive or inappropriate jokes, and focus on lighthearted humor that brings people together. And if you struggle to be humorous, don’t try: it can backfire on you!  Just remember, though, that when you can use humor, you’ll leave a lasting – and favorable – impression.

9. Treat People WIth Respect

Treating other people with respect and kindness is absolutely fundamental to likeable behavior. If you show respect, you’ll  show how you care about others people’s feelings, opinions, and even their boundaries.  This leads to mutual trust and admiration. Start by practicing basic manners, like saying “please” and “thank you.”  Show your appreciation of other people’s contributions and perspectives. But be mindful of cultural differences and avoid making assumptions based on stereotypes. When you treat everyone with respect and dignity, you’ll earn the admiration of those around you.

10. Be Self-Aware

Developing self-awareness is essential if you want to see how your behavior and actions impact others’ perceptions of you. Take time to think about your strengths, weaknesses, and areas for growth; be open to feedback from others. Pay attention to how you interact with other people, and weigh up how your words and actions may be interpreted. By increasing your self-awareness, you can decide how to improve your likeability and strengthen your relationships.

If you take the time to run through the above suggestions, so you can assess, and enhance, your likeability. And whether you’re aiming to improve your personal network, strengthen friendships, or simply make a great impact on those around you, cultivating likeable traits and behaviors will get you to where you want to be.